Wonder if he or she is the one in your life? While there isn’t a fool-proof test to ascertain that, there are a few signs you can watch out for…
10 signs you have found ‘the one’:
1. When the time is right!
For many, relationships are fraught with obstacles. There is always something that keeps them from enjoying it the way it is. It might be a stressful job or lack of money. And both people in the relationship feel when the problem is resolved, they’ll be truly happy together. Unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way.
When you’ve met the one, you’ll embrace each other no matter what the situation. A happy well-adjusted couple doesn’t have to chase what should or could be. The two will share a comfort level that enables them to support each other through a crisis rather than wait upon it to resolve to be content together.
2. You are comfortable being you.
You know you have met the one when your partner loves you for exactly what and who you are. When there is complete acceptance of each other, the relationship is more fulfilling. This doesn’t mean one condones bad behaviour or such.
So if the person isn’t critical of your every move, and if you are comfortable just being you when you’re around the person – it’s a sign that he/she is worth spending your life together.
Let’s look at a hypothetical situation to illustrate this: There are two couples, couple X and couple Y. Both these couples have been together for the same amount of time. Couple X has frequent conflict, couple Y has never had one. Who among the two has a healthy relationship?
If you’re answer was couple Y, you’re wrong. It’s impossible for two people who’re together to have no conflict at all. In the case of couple Y, it’s most likely that one or both partners is not forthcoming about problems. The needs of one or both partners isn’t being voiced and hence not addressed.
So how you communicate your needs and manage conflict is a significant pointer.
4. There’s no relationship anxiety.
If you find yourself constantly worrying about insignificant things in the relationship, then stop and introspect. When you’ve met the one, there is less anxiety about the relationship.
5. Trust your gut.
Examine your true feeling. How do you feel when you are around him or her? If you’re at ease and truly feel he’s the one, then go for it. Listen to your gut, and you’ll know whether this one is for keeps.
6. There is no drama.
If he/she is the one, it doesn’t mean you have to be perfect together. Rather look at conflict when it arises and try to make the relationship work.
When in conflict, how do you two deal with it? Is there a lot of yelling and shouting or do you hear each other out and acknowledge one another’s feelings?
If there is drama, there is manipulation, abuse and the kind. It’s best to re-examine your relationship before you fully commit, if this is the case.
7. Your closed ones see what you see!
If the people who love you are asking you to get away from him/her, then you might want to take a second look. Sometimes, however, your friends/family might push for a relationship that you have no interest in. In such cases, it’s not wise to follow their lead.
8. You remain a priority in your life.
If you find yourself changing your priorities in life to accommodate that person, it shows that you’re undermining your own importance and needs. This could well amount to you getting carried away in the relationship you are in. In the long term, this just won’t work.
You know the person is for keeps, when you remain a priority in your life while you’re in the relationship. And how does he/she feel about it? This one is also about whether you – personally — are ready for a long-term relationship.
9. The compatibility factor.
It’s true that opposites attract, however, such relationships don’t stand the test of time. What matters most in a long-term — committed relationship — is compatibility. This doesn’t mean the two are completely alike, rather the stress is on a strong common ground. Your life values, career goals, and priorities ought to be compatible for a fulfilling, lasting relationship.
10. Mutual respect.
Respect for each other is the foundation of all relationships, and certainly is in a couple’s relationship. There is no way you can build a lasting, secure relationship without this.