So, you’ve been going out for over a year with your girlfriend and feel its the right time to take the relationship to the next level.
You may claim to know her at the best as well as worst behaviour and accept her for who she is. Great, but that’s not all that it takes to make relationships work. Find out a few things you should look at before taking the ultimate step.
Dealing with secrets
As and when you get married, your partner will be the custodian of all your secrets. It is important to know that you can open up to her and talk even about embarrassing things that you did as a child or negative qualities that you’re trying to break. You should also get a measure that she will be as willing to share her secrets once she has committed to you. Without openness, there can be no trust and without trust, there is no relationship.
Dealing with friends
Most women become too possessive about their guys. While guys appreciate a certain amount of jealousy, it can quickly begin to irritate if she doesn’t even allow you to go for an occasional night out with your guy friends to catch a drink. Most women give out signals about their level of possessiveness in very subtle ways. You need to attune yourself to the signs to know more about her level of possessiveness. Unfortunately, this topic can quickly turn ugly if you discuss it with her so discretion is advised if you’re going down this road.
Dealing with family
This is the most important part of the puzzle. Unless she knows and respects your family, you will never know how they will react to each other. If you’re sure about her, take her to your parents and assess how their meeting goes. Take down mental notes and ask both parties about their first impressions. If there are misunderstandings, clear then. If there are problem areas, find solutions. Crossing this hurdle is more than half the battle won.
Dealing with conflict
How often do you engage in lover’s tiff? If you answer with “more than once a week”, you need to reassess your stand. Once you marry your partner, you do not want small issues to take centrestage in your domestic battles. Your partner should be able to bring out the best in you and should stand behind you even in the most difficult of times. However, if this seems to be an exception rather than a norm and she always prioritises herself and her needs over yours, know that things will only get worse from here on. Have a frank chat and mutually decide on how you will avoid conflict when it arises.
Dealing with your feelings
The best test of knowing whether your girlfriend should become your partner will come from within yourself. It would be prudent, however, not to confuse feelings of lust or a desperation to get married, with signs that she is the one. You cannot hurry into taking one of the most important decisions of your life based on the wrong feeling. When you feel confident about your decision, the small voice within you will automatically assume control to bring magic to your life. Enjoy the rush.
If she is really the one for you, you’ll just know. After all, you cannot miss those strong signals your heart would be sending you in such a scenario.
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