1. Know her letters and digits
Briefs and thongs typically run XS, S, M, L and XL (small, medium, large, etc. — in case you’ve never encountered clothes before). Bras go by cup size (A, B, C, D, etc.) and band size (32, 34, 36, etc.), which is basically the circumference around her chest and back. Can’t size her up? Just open her underwear drawer and check the tags.
2. Buy something in those sizes
Don’t think you will earn points for buying your wife an XS when the tag you spied clearly states she’s a large. It won’t fit. And she won’t feel sexy when she can’t make it fit. Trust us.
3. Accept help
Chances are a sales associate will see the fear in your eyes and offer to assist you. Say yes. Do not say you are “just browsing.” No dude is “just browsing” in a store full of panties and push-ups. (If he is, he’s a total creep. Don’t be a creep.)
4. Shop for her, not you
You’ve probably never considered how uncomfortable lace can feel. Or maybe you have. Nobody’s judging. The point is, you might get revved up at that negligee covered in glitter, but it’s not going to feel fab for your wife. Go for softer fabrics like silk, satin or cotton.
5. Stay clear of the bins
These plastic containers are actually the sale rack, and there are few things tackier than gifting discounted lingerie. Stick to what’s on hangers or displayed in pretty little rows on tables.
6. Skip bras with gels or other squishy inserts
A little padding is fine, but unless you’re planning on having sex at sea and using your girlfriend as a flotation device, there’s no need. And you really don’t want her to think you’re hinting at something.
7. Don’t make it a panel discussion
While it’s fine to ask a sales rep what she thinks, it’s not okay to get the opinion of random shoppers. This means no holding things up and saying, “You’re my girlfriend’s size. Mind standing still?”
8. Get a gift receipt
Of course you’re probably going to pick out the most fabulous piece of lingerie known to woman (and man). But just do it anyway.